Today I’m not gonna be all poetic and just write things as they are. Well, we’ve all been to high school and had our own experiences. Some good; others bad. Somewhere down the line we’ve had to feel peer pressure and want to “fit in”. We’ve been bullied or laughed at, we’ve had crazy moments with friends and loads of laughter. But there are days we’re alone and sad and feel the need to break free and isolate ourselves from the world and just take out some time for ourselves and think and try to figure out who we are and where we’re going.
Give or take, high school is what it is. But at the end of the day, it forms and structures us and it is that yellow brick road to our future. It moulds us further into becoming the people that we truly are. You may lose friends along the way and gain better one’s later. There’s no telling what’ll happen! I just so happened to have graduated school and now I’m gonna be “out in the real world” as they say. From the country I come from, it’s very important to get into college – without which it is almost impossible to get a good paying job or a job at all. I’m in that transitional phase. The feeling is… Metamorphic. I’m trying to get over this stress I’ve been feeling for the past one month. Asking myself questions like “What if college isn’t everything I thought it would be? “What if I don’t make friends?” “What if I don’t like my course and can’t get a job later?” Problem is, everyone these days have to think about this and the risk of doing something and if it poses as a threat to their career.
Currently what has been giving me sleepless nights is the fact that someone I know who got just a 50% over all managed to get into college then too in the English Honours department. And I’m thinking to myself… “How is that even possible?” Honours courses are really tough and require a minimum of 70% (emphasis on the minimum part). So how…? Is life really that unfair? I’ll get the answer to that later.
Sigh… The sorrow of being 17. I’ll miss it later but now, I’m not too thrilled about it. Well, I’ve done my worst by making this sound like it came out of a typical teenage girl’s diary but well, I needed somewhere to vent I suppose. It’s one of those days where you’d sit on the couch at home and turn on the T.V and have your mind drift off on a little cloud of thought while you sit there hogging on your chips and a candy bar in your pyjamas. I so hope I get into college. That’s all I want right now.Oh the intimidation! I wish a giant rainbow would appear taking me to the pearly gates where I met God and did our secret handshake and just found happiness. Why is this happening to me? -_-
Oh well, I guess that’s it for today. Kind of an abrupt ending but I can’t exactly access my train of thought right now. I do hope for some advice though.